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My Covid Diaries: God ordained pregnancy

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“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” Colossians 3:17

My pregnancy progressed with no obstacles. Movements became stronger by the day and it filled my heart with joy every time I felt him move. I started showing pretty early and also lost between 8-10 kgs in the first and second trimester because of my eating habits. Overall, we were blessed with a peaceful pregnancy, considering we were busy balancing our office work and home work and were up late most nights.

Letting my office know!

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8

Sometime in July, there were talks about offices opening up in phases and this worried me a bit. I decided to have a talk with my manager and to let him know that I am pregnant. When I chatted with him, by default I took the approach of apologizing for being pregnant, like I was admitting I made a mistake; and I also was more focused on reassuring my manager that my pregnancy would not stop me from performing at the expected levels. His response shocked me. He first asked me not to apologize and congratulated me because a second kid is good news (I knew that but the fear of being judged made me behave otherwise). He went on to tell how good it is to have a second child and that we had made a good decision as a family. He concluded by assuring me that the team, office, and he would help in every way to make my pregnancy easy on me and that I would not be required to come to office until it is completely safe to and only if I want to. He even asked me to send an email including everything we discussed and replied back with a confirmation on the same.

His kind words really made me feel so much comfortable, it showed that as an organization and as a manager, they had my best interests in mind, and treated me like an employee and not a machine. With the way things were going, offices did not open until much much later, sometime in either November or December!

Thia starts loving baby Lionel…

“For you make me glad by your deeds, Lord; I sing for joy at what your hands have done. How great are your works, Lord, how profound your thoughts!” Psalms 92:4-5

We had to consciously make Thia sleep next to Santosh more, to avoid her kicking or headbutting my stomach by mistake in the night. The transition was hard but Thia made it easy, as always! She was weaned off breastmilk and moved to formula in the first trimester and soon she started to understand when we repeatedly told her that there is a baby in amma’s stomach. One day, sometime between the first and second trimester, Thia lifted my t-shirt up and kissed my stomach and said baby Lion. From that day onwards, she always addressed my stomach as baby Lion and was always aware that she had to be careful around my stomach.

When the movements became more prominent, I started letting her feel the kicks, but it took her till my third trimester to properly feel the kicks herself when I put her hand over my stomach. Through my pregnancy, Thia grew to love her little brother in my stomach, much before he was even born. This truly was a blessed time.

Our decision to shift homes!

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

In the mid of 2020, we decided that we would need to shift to a smaller house to be more financially stable. We first discussed making this move sometime in the beginning of 2021. But circumstances changed and we had to prepone our decision to move as early as October itself. After discussions and debates, we decided to move in October so that it won’t be too close to my delivery date. My dad decided to move in to a one bedroom close to us so that he would continue to have his own space and privacy.

Once that was decided, we started mentally preparing ourselves for the move, as we knew this time we had accumulated a lot of stuff and the move was definitely going to be super hard on us 😛

Continued protection and good health!

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes and through my second trimester, we were able to better refine my diet. Also, with a better understanding of what suited and what didn’t suit me, we were able to keep my sugar under control with almost minimal oral medication, and no insulin, AT ALL!!!

Our anomaly and NT scan went well and baby Lion was growing strong, healthy and flawless, under God’s love and protection. We only regretted not spending as much time talking to Lionel as we did with Thia. Our main focus was to ensure Thia never felt excluded, whilst getting our office work done and keeping the house clean. Now that by itself was a herculean task.

My blessing: my husband!!!

“In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5:28-33

Santosh spent most of last year working day and night! During the day he took care of Thia, and in the nights he worked late to ensure he was meeting deadlines. And he never complained, even once…

I can’t thank God enough for him in my life. The way he is, the way he treats me and our family, is a true testament to his upbringing and faith, all and only God it is!

My Pregnancy and God!

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Part 4

You continued to grow in me, with a growing tummy and a heart full of anticipation I awaited my D-day!

‘For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord , “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ‘ Jeremiah 29:11

Yes, we were starting our third trimester and pretty excited. So we were just bursting with excitement and looking forward to your every next kick or movement within me. In meanwhile, in the office, my manager asked me to go into my maternity leave early, as my project was closed 3 weeks before the expected end date. She wanted me to get on maternity by the end of July, but then when I tried to initiate, I was informed that paid maternity leave could only be started some 2 months before the expected due date, which was August 20. So then we decided to wait it out cause we couldn’t afford to have a loss of pay right before the delivery. So that was decided, I was going to start my maternity leave August 21st, which coincidentally was just before paati’s birthday.

We had also just found a house for thatha to move in with us. Now came the hard part, actually moving! We decided to move on the 27th and 28th of July and we knew we had a good week before that happened. I fell sick sometime around the 22nd of July, amma got fever, cough and body pain! Amma had not only over-exerted when Ashnil anna came home, but she also sat and ate a bowl full of ice cream, thus the cough and fever. I had to go into emergency and get checked when my temperature stayed high for too long, and appa and I were so tensed and worried about your safety. The doctor checked me, we were in emergency for almost 4 hours, and they finally said that it was a UTI which had caused everything and that I should take some meds and be careful about using public restrooms. Thank God for protecting you in my womb every day and in every way.

Friends are such a blessing always!

‘Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice. ‘ Proverbs 27:9

Soon it was moving day, and we had loads of friends who were kind enough to help us with the whole moving process. On the first day, the 27th, we moved our one bedroom house with the help of movers and packers and super awesome friends like Harsha and Nishanth. The whole move took the entire day, was super tedious and tiring, and we hardly ate anything. When we were finally done evening and everyone left, we started arranging our clothes in our cupboard and we realised that we, appa and I, had completely lost our appetites. Appa said he wouldn’t eat anything, but I had to eat something to ensure you were okay, so I ended up ordering a vanilla milkshake for dinner!

We slept knowing that the next day would be worse. Thatha was reaching in the early morning, and a few hours after that, all of my Chennai home was arriving, to be arranged in the new house!

Wow the thought of all that stuff coming in just terrified us but we just prayed and slept, asking God for strength to face the next day. The next morning, thatha came and slept for a few hours. Appa and I woke up starving and went out to eat some hot idlis. We brought some back for thatha and by the time he was done eating, the packers and movers reached with the stuff from Chennai. And that is when it began! The entire day went in organising, identifying and distributing all the stuff: as what we want, what Sneha periamma wants and what Lachi periamma wants. Wow, it was A LOT OF WORK! But it felt good going through all this stuff from home, sorting through to see who wants what.

Amma got shouted at a lot because I tried to do a lot even though I wasn’t supposed to! But you can’t really blame me for wanting to help, cause that’s just part of who I am. We closed the day exhausted and knowing that we weren’t anywhere close to done. That would take us a couple of weeks, and it did! Over the next 2 weeks, we managed to unpack and arrange everything at our own pace. By now, you were kicking and moving around a lot. Your most active time was right before I sept in the night. But you were weirdly camera-shy, every time we brought our mobile out to capture your movements and kicks, you would just stop moving. This made it impossible to capture these special moments to show Harini athai and Vinu athai.

We celebrated Geetha paati’s birthday, in remembrance of her!

‘Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice. ‘ Proverbs 27:9

We decided to celebrate Geetha paati’s birthday and call everyone over. On August 22nd we had a small get together and it was so much fun. Paati was missed so much and we all wished that she would have been with us. Here is a glimpse of you during one of our last scans:

Here you are, all huddled up and comfortable inside amma

We realised that this was the perfect house for get-togethers and parties because of space and the overall area.

Now came the time for appa to plan my baby shower (I told him I want one no matter what). It was planned to happen mid-September and it was such a success, here are some pictures from my special day:

Ready for you, I waited in anticipation of the day I would get to hold you in my arms!

‘When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall. Wait for the Lord ; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord .’ Psalms 27:2,14

Post the baby shower, a week later, I was full-term and ready to deliver anytime. Now all I had to do is sit around and wait. This was the best time, I sat at home doing, eating well, watching TV and taking random long naps (though sleeping was becoming harder every day).

Sugandhy paati took such good care of your amma all through the pregnancy, cooking all her favorite food, and just being there; that amma never felt that Geetha paati wasn’t around (even though she was missed a lot). 2 weeks before my due date, we celebrate Rahul anna’s birthday at home, and just before everyone came home, amma had a false alarm. We all thought I was going to go into labor, but Lachi periamma asked me to lie down and drink water and wait to see if it continued, and it didn’t. So we immediately knew it was false contractions.

We waited every day with bated breath, keeping our eyes open for any sign that I may be ready. Dr. Rajnish asked us to get admitted on Oct 14 (my due date), if I did not go into labor naturally. Appa took the last week of my pregnancy off! He could not handle sitting at office when all he had on his mind was me, and what will happen if I went into labour when he was in office and he was not reachable (Bangalore network!)

Finally, it was October 13, and we were getting admitted the next evening. Dr. Rajnish asked us to come into emergency 14th evening. Our bags were packed and we were ready and still hopeful that I might go into labour naturally before that. But alas, that was not God’s plan for me. I was admitted on 14th and what happened after that, that is something I will tell you in my next letter, Thia!

Fun fact: Do you know what was my meal the night before I got admitted to the hospital? Maggi and fried sausages! Sausages are something that I didn’t eat through my pregnancy, because we totally avoided all processed food. Ok so now let me close with this, and we will continue soon with the miraculous story of your birth.

The yummiest maggi and fried sausages I have ever had!